Last night, I was really frustrated with Jamie. We had been having pretty much the same argument for days - I wanted him to act like a human being, and he wanted to disobey every rule in the house and get a bad attitude when I called him out on it. So, my apartment has been a war zone for several days. See, when I posted on my blog before that he was a sensitive, sweet, empathetic person, I should have added "to everyone except his mother."
I have also been dealing with my father's usual shenanigans - belittling me, questioning my parenting skills (as if he even knows what those are!), hanging up on me, etc. So between dealing with my kid, dealing with my dad, and the various and sundry worries that haunt a single mom, I was at my wit's end. So I blogged. I blogged a very long, rambling tirade about how fed up I was with everything, how I couldn't handle it, how I felt like I was being punished, etc. etc. I also blogged about how I've been praying, but it doesn't seem to be helping.
Then I remembered what Everett said about persistence in prayer, and what all I've read about God's timing. So, while I was walking the dog for the last time last night, I prayed again. "Lord," I said. "Please help me deal with all this." And that's pretty much what I kept repeating. Then I made sure to thank him for the all the blessings I have in my life (because I don't want to be one of those whine-y people who only see the glass as half-empty). Then I went to bed.
Well, I got up this morning and said my prayer of thankfulness again, and asked again for help in dealing with all that's on my plate. Then I decided to take a few minutes to check my blog and read over what I had written. Suze had been up early and read my blog and sent me some encouraging words and sympathy. Then I read over what I wrote, and realized how irrational and insane I sounded. So I e-mailed Suze to thank her, then deleted the blog post I had written last night.
Then, I said another little prayer before I went to wake up Jamie. He has been pretty much a grizzly from the time he wakes up until he goes to bed. Today, he woke up my sweet, loving little boy again. Thank you, Jesus. Then, my dad called to make sure I got up on time, and to tell me he loved me. No snide remarks, no hanging up on me, just "I love you." Thank you, Jesus, again!
Then I went to work. I've been working on a big report - hence the decrease in blogging. I decided to check to see what all had been processed in my quest to attend TWU this fall. Hallelujah! I've been granted enough financial aid, not only for my tuition and text books, but with a nice chunk left over to put a big dent in some big bills. Thank you, Jesus, again again!
So, my persistence paid off. Not only will I keep applying that persistence in my prayers and Bible reading, but I'm definitely going to apply that persistence in some other areas, too!